So, there I was, minding my own business at the premiere of, A Million Ways To Die In The West, getting ready to partake in some after party libations when suddenly, I was bombarded with people requesting my picture and autograph. I immediately started to sweat. I didn’t expect this. This wasn’t my premiere. How did they even know I would be there? I don’t play off being comfortable when I am not very well, at all, but they still seemed to want my picture. (I can assure you these were not my best selfies!)
Before I could really comprehend what was going on, I had thousands of photos.. of myself, being pushed in my face to sign! In reality there were probably like 12. But, it seemed like thousands!!
I suddenly forgot how to spell my name!
What was it again?
Fuck! My handwriting is so sloppy.
I should have practiced more! This isn’t the Palmer method! The nuns in the 4th grade would have cracked a ruler over my wrist for such bad handwriting...had I been taught by nuns in the 4th grade. No joke, these were the thoughts running through my brain at this exact moment.
It was then, some sweet little hand reached out and touched my shoulder ever so gently to encourage me to turn and smile at a camera her husband was holding. As I looked down at her, I saw the most beautiful, beaming little Asian face and I realized..these weren’t just random people, they were also fans. My fans!
I immediately relaxed and told myself to enjoy this moment. I signed as many autographs as I could before the security guard had to escort me out of the crowd and into the party. That’s something pretty special for a girl from Frankford.
I cannot promise you I didn’t pee a little in my pants.